Do you think Indian Married women get stuck after getting married? #Womenarebliss

 In India, during marriage rituals, there are some pheras, in which lady need to follow the man and they take vows for this life. And in some pheras man has to follow a lady. So no custom or ritual says a woman has to be behind a man. There are many successful ‘Married’ women in the 21st century obviously, their soulmates have been a part of their journey.

To be honest, initially, I even felt the same way, that due to marriage I might have to give up on things. But I was very very wrong on this.

On random thought, I told him,

“I wish I can be an independent lady."

“Who did stop you?”

“Precisely, No one.

“Indirectly?”

“No one.”

“Then what's stopping you?”

I did not get the answer.

After a minute, he spoke, “Your overthinking.”

For a while I gave a thought, he was right no one denied me to do anything. No one ever told me ‘Don’t do this. This is not to be done by you or anything else’. It was me who assumed I am not allowed to start my new thing. I just have to fulfill my duties & responsibilities and in my free time, I get to do what I want. In fact, when I just shared the thing with my in-laws, they appreciated me a lot to use the time productively.

So nowadays we have a habit of assuming and overthinking without even initiating the work. Today people believe in appreciating the work and keeping their surroundings motivated. (Surely not talking about those typical aunties of our building).

I just heard from one of my friends,” If I would have taken birth in the US, I would be lucky enough to play the role of a single mother just like in that series”. For a moment, I was even fantasized, thinking this might be cool these days. But then suddenly I felt a pain in my stomach thinking what would it be like not having my dad for me? Quite weird and lonely. Modernization cannot overcome the essence of relationship and taste of bond.

After getting married, the next earliest hope and wishes that come to you in the gift is “to have a child”. These days couples plan for it only when they want, but why does society still keep on muttering the same wish, wherever they meet? Can’t this be changed? This is one of the reasons even, youth have stopped attending the social events in the existence of adults.

I recently watched a movie called “Shaadisthan”, there were three leading women.In which one of the leading characters named KAMLA SHARMA (role played by Nivedita Bhattacharya) said that ‘when women have to shout to the world they are equal to men, that’s their weakness. Deeds have more impact than words. Why do they need to tell the world all this?’

In the movie name “KI & KA”, Kia (role played by Kareena Kapoor), wanted to be an independent woman, so at her choice, he did not marry anyone because she thought she might need to work as a housewife and have to leave her ambition aside. But luckily she got Kabir (role played by Arjun Kapoor) who understood her and was ready to be a househusband and let her wife achieve what she wanted. This was an inspiring story for many women as well as husbands to support their loved ones and take one step beyond in their relation.

Many women these days even prefer to be a homemaker instead of being a working lady. That’s what I appreciate a lot. Because to work in an office with salary is easier and motivating than working in the kitchen with not enough ‘ME’ time and fulfilling every demand and wish of the family without a salary of a single penny while listening to loop holes. Still, people have a mentality that a working lady is more hard-working than one working in their kitchen. I insist all of those humans just spend one day in the kitchen and maintain all stock of groceries and manage it well. Trust me, many of you will fail.

To those women, I want to just applaud and say “You are great” to those who selected kitchen and home over office and fame.

Working women even get their identity, what about the one working in the kitchen?

Those who are afraid of marriage, don’t be unless you get a good life partner whether arranged or love marriage.

Marriage is all about adding value to your life by joining a new relationship just like sugar does to milk by making it more sweet and tasty. It's not about compromising your desires or giving up on your dreams. Instead, you get more support and a close person to have a watch on you and help you to improve and turn your shitty day into an amazing one.

So it is all about the mindset and perspective we carry with us.